Mother's Day. I can't let the day completely escape me without saying something about this day.
It's a day for husbands to venture into the kitchen and try their hand at breakfast (mine made his first over-easy egg this morning), for daddies and daughters (or sons) to wrap gifts they walked the store aisles to find, for mommies to be presented colorful cards from the hands of a little bearing bright, excited eyes, glowing smiles and a sing-songy "Happy Mofer's Day!" Yes, it is that kind of wonderful day.
And this year, I got an extra-special treat. Georgia actually posed for a picture with me. Last year, the attempt ended (and started) with tears on her part, and me eventually just giving up.
But this year, I have a beautiful picture of my perfect little family to remind me of this day. What more can I ask for?
Of course, a Mother's Day post from me would not be complete without mentioning my own mother. I tried to stay numb about the subject matter today, and honestly, did my best to not think about her at all. Did I? Of course, I allowed my mind to wander a few times, and wish to God heaven had phones. Did I still get choked up when my husband called his own mom? Of course, and then felt the tears sting my eyes as my daughter took the phone and talked to her. Did I wonder what my mother would have sent me this year? Of course I did, but not because I want the gift, but because she always had this amazing way of surprising me with the perfect gift that I didn't even know I needed or wanted until she gave it to me... and then I would think, "now isn't this just perfect?" It's because she always listened to me and she KNEW me like no one has ever known me or will ever know me again. (but my sister sent me a wonderful gift and made me smile. she's turning out to be just like mom)
Do I miss all those things - HELL YES I DO. But the best way I know to honor her on this Mother's Day since I can't send her a gift or call her on the phone is to strive every day to be more like her. I know I will never be the same kind of mother she was: 1.) I have too much of my father in me, 2.) I'm the mother I AM, just as I should be. But I try to channel many of the lessons she taught me whenever I can.
I try to have her patience. She had patience like none other I've ever seen. You could not rattle her. Because I lack in the patience department, I think that's one of the things I admire most about her. When my daughter is screaming "NO" back in my face and throwing things in frustration, it is so easy to yell right back at her. But I try to stop and remember my mom's voice - a voice that always seemed to stay calm, even-toned and soothing. I try really, really hard.
I try to listen to my daughter whenever she's talking to me. Not the half-hearing while I'm doing something else kind of listening - although that kind certainly exists in this house - but the kind of listening where I hear every word and she KNOWS I'm hearing every word. I always knew my mom was listening. If I didn't realize right at the moment, I did when she let me know with a simple gesture or comment - maybe that perfect gift she got out of one of our conversations. I hope my daughter always know I hear her.
I try to teach my daughter the way my mother taught me. Again, I think part of this comes back to that patience thing. My mom could go over and over and over and over something with me and never lose hope. But I also think it was that she always made time for me. She was never too busy. OK, never might be a slight exaggeration, but if she was at that exact moment, she made sure to remember what I needed help with and find time as soon as she could. She made me feel important.
I try to love the way my mother loved. Simply put, I want my daughter to always know I love her - no matter what. I knew that with my mother, and I definitely tested it on more than one occasion. I gave her a few reasons to write me off, and I pushed her away a few times the best I could. But every time I turned around, she was right there with open arms and loving words. Georgia will ALWAYS have that.
I will make sure she always knows she is believed in, she is strong, she is smart, she is beautiful and she is loved, loved, loved. That is the only gift I can give my mom on this Mother's Day.
I hope you all had a wonderful day and that you kissed and hugged your mom if you could. Trust me, do it every chance you get.